Jan 29

The iPad, Snark-Free Edition — Epilogue

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As I noodle about the thing further, I think Tam has the right of it:

Fearless Prediction of the trajectory of “$Apple Product” (where “$Apple Product” != “Newton”):

1) Product is hyped to the sky before anybody’s seen one.
2) Product is released. Mac Fanboys line up to get raped at Apple stores worldwide.
3) Cutting edge Linux-using nerds mock it mercilessly for missing features and/or compromised functionality.
4) Mac Fanboys make tearful “Leave Britney Alone!” videos, defending their overpriced, underfunctioning tchotchkes.
5) Six to twelve months later, Apple releases “”$Apple Product G2“, with its deficiencies corrected and the price slashed by half.
6) Mac Fanboys howl bloody murder.
7) Everyone buys one, or a clone of one, as another industry gets altered for good.

And yet every time the loyal faithful can be found outside the Apple store on opening day, slightly dazed-looking, bowlegged, and holding large sums of crumpled bills in one sweaty hand and a tube of KY in the other, ready to do it all again…

So it’s “wait for the second-generation version,” then.

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4 comments so far...

  • Anthony Cordeiro Said on January 29th, 2010 at 5:27 pm:

    I have to wonder if Apple could really, really be so blind as to have so many glaring holes left in the device. Were they just not able to deliver iPhone OS 4.x in time for the release? The one with multitasking (if we’re hoping people use iPads as computers) built in? Still though, they don’t seem to get that people don’t want another monthly data bill, and sticking their fingers in their ears and yelling “FLASH SUX CANT HEAR YOU LA LA LA” is not going to cause the internet to abandon its glitzy web site darling.

  • Colin Cashman Said on January 29th, 2010 at 8:26 pm:

    iPhone OSes are revved in July, not in April. If multitasking is coming, it’s coming along with the next rev of the iPhone hardware. And if Jobs HAD announced iPhone OS 4, but not put it on the tablet until July, people would be ripping him for _that_. It was basically a no-win.

  • Anne Murray Said on February 5th, 2010 at 7:30 am:

    HTML 5 will be replacing flash player.

  • Brett Cashman Said on February 5th, 2010 at 1:24 pm:

    I will believe that when I see it, Anne. HTML5 is great and all, but the web is swimming in Flash content that nobody’s in any real hurry to convert.